Monday, 22 August 2016

When Peppa Pig is Just Plain Silly

Peppa Pig is silly.

All the animals walk on two legs, talk and live in houses on the top of hills*. Miss Rabbit does all all the jobs. But I'm not even talking about that. I'm talking about moments within the world of Peppa Pig which just make no sense and are borderline ridiculous/confusing. 

Here are a few of my bug bears (and yes, I have devoted way too much time to Peppa Pig here):


1. Most of the characters have alliterative names. Even Zoe Zebra's twin sisters have (made up?!) alliterative names in Zuzu and Zaza. What, therefore, is the explanation for poor George Pig? Chloe Pig has also been denied a name in fitting with her pigginess although I think the creators were going along the lines of 'Cousin Chloe'. Poor Chloe; destined forever to introduce herself as a relation to Peppa Pig in order to capitalise on her alliterative name. And her baby brother, also a pig? Alexander. These poor infant piggies.

*2. Whilst we're talking about most of the characters, let's talk about the fact that being true to nature went decidedly out of the window the moment the creators decided to make animals talk. And live in houses. Why, then, did it suddenly become crucial to maintain a bit of scientific fact and have the rabbits live in a burrow. These rabbits talk, wear clothes and make carrot soup (in a blender probably - no doubt the burrow is on grid) so why not just let them live in a house like the rest of the inhabitants of Peppa Pig world? I appreciate the education in the episode where we learn about the burrow but this then just makes my children think it's all educational and that pigs sleep in bunk beds.

3. Now I know Peppa is in some sort of Narnia where time never really moves on and so, despite the odd birthday party here and there, the animals remain forever the same age. So I understand why George never really grows his vocabulary or the ability to speak in sentences. But I am perplexed at the way he says "Ganpa ig". He can clearly pronounce the 'p' because he says it in "Ganpa". Why then can he not pronounce it in 'pig'? 

4. Have you ever blown arm bands up? It's tough going sometimes. Now imagine blowing them up whilst already on your kids' arms like Daddy Pig does when they all go to the swimming pool (the same episode in which eighteen month old George is left to change himself for swimming independently in his own cubicle?!) Poor Peppa and George; it'd be like having your blood pressure checked before entering the pool.

5. My eldest is four. I'm considering sending him alone on the train to France and then calling his destination a few minutes before his arrival just to inform them he's staying there. Sound ridiculous? Spare a thought then for poor Delphine Donkey who is, at a similar age, sent from France with a quick courtesy call to inform Peppa's family of her arrival two minutes before she gets to the station. Her parents don't even know if Peppa and the gang are at home! They could be on a month's holiday in Barbados. Thankfully they are at home and Delphine gets to enjoy such wonderfully cultural experiences as 'The Bing Bong Song' whilst attending playgroup with Peppa. Lucky Delphine. She probably wishes the pigs had been in Barbados. 

6. The animals have pets. It's confusing. Some animals can drive cars and shop in supermarkets whilst others remain as nature intended (ducks, Goldy the fish, Tiddles the tortoise). Maybe it's a mammals vs others thing?

7. Whilst we're discussing different animals, with the exception of the pets, all the animals are the same size. So an elephant is the same size as a cat who is the same size as a hamster (with a PhD in veterinary practice and an irritating voice). The only exception to size is age. Otherwise kangaroos and rabbits are one and the same.

8. Mr Potato. As if Peppa Pig world wasn't weird enough, the inhabitants have a potato the same size as an adult pig/rabbit/zebra/elephant (see previous point) who talks, hosts his own TV show and has his own theme park. As a local celebrity he is definitely an unusual choice. 

The thing with Peppa Pig is that, despite all the silliness, it is somehow genius for children. I'll never forget the moment I realised that Madame Gazelle (the French, single, playgroup leader with delightful eyeshadow) sounds so close to 'Mademoiselle' that it can't have been an accident. 

All  ridiculousness forgiven. Just.






Proudly linking up with:
Pink Pear Bear
Rhyming with Wine

Monday, 15 August 2016

Now You Are Four

Dear Big One

Four years ago I had just given birth. I was holding a naked, newborn you in my arms and I knew my whole world had changed. You became the centre of it and turned it upside down.

You taught me to feel everything with an intensity I never believed existed: exhaustion, excitement, frustration, joy. But most of all love. 

It's been an adventure Big One. We have travelled around the sun together four times. 

There's no bigger adventure than that. 

I hope you like your gifts today Big One. But know that, no matter how much you love them, they will never compare to the gift we were blessed with four years ago.

They will never compare to the gift of you. 

Love you forever. Always have. Always will.

Mummy



P.s sorry you haven't received the six board games you requested for the very first time at bed time last night. I need a bit more notice than that.

Thursday, 11 August 2016

I Have An Announcement...

I have an announcement.



Actually no, it's not what you might think if you only looked at this picture.

I want to announce this:


I think, after carrying two children, I look more pregnant more often now, than when I was actually carrying them. I have more 'fat days'. More days where my tummy just wants to shout out to the world that it carried two babies and refuses to be contained. 

And some days I hate it. But then I realise I can breathe in, do some magic with my posture and I don't look fat anymore. In fact I kinda look a bit thin.




And that feels embarrassing to say. Why am I embarrassed to say 'yeah I look a bit skinny today'? Because I feel a fraud? No, not really. Because I'm definitely not 'skinny' but it's not the falsehood that makes me embarrassed. It's that I feel conceited. 

But I only feel that because we've sort of been conditioned to think that skinny is good. Skinny is perfection. It is the ideal for which we should strive. And not many people like to walk around saying 'I'm perfect'. 'I'm ideal'. It just feels big headed.

But that's not what we're saying when we acknowledge we look a bit skinny. Because skinny isn't the bloody be-all-and-end-all. There is no perfect. There is no ideal. Skinny, curvy (actually front on I'm way more curvy than skinny - but now I feel like I'm boasting about being Marilyn Monroe so you can see my problem here), pear- shaped, apple-shaped, hourglass-shaped. None of them are 'ideal'.

I'll tell you what is ideal. Owning it. Owning your body and loving it and respecting that it supports you and helps you move and function day in day out. 

I am me-shaped. And, as is clear from my pictures, being me is all about perspective. I can dwell on the things which get me down (I totally do this sometimes - husband has used the word martyr a few times) or I can look for the positives. Today I choose the positives. I don't do that everyday (see above for references to martyrdom) but today I do.

Because I'm not just talking about body image here. I'm talking about life. And, today, perspective tells me that I'm actually very freaking lucky. 

My Kid Doesn't Poop Rainbows
The Pramshed